Ive had two children vaginally. My first was a hard delivery probably made more complicated by doctors. My second was a much larger baby but a much easier delivery. Much quicker.
My honest biggest fear isnta complication so much as a c section. Im very terrified of neeing surgery to deliver a child.
Im not stupid and ive done this a couple of times before so i know how labor and delivery works. But here i am stupidly watching a baby show about delivery and listening to them feed her a bunch of crap. Its like they just lead people to having c sections. Here i am, ive spent hours researching labor and delivery, and im so stressed that they are going to push me into something that isnt really needed and that i dont want.
I really hope that Tony is up for the challenge of standing up to docs wanting to do when i know i can do this just fine on my own. I can do it, ive done it before.
Im not speaking of disregarding a c section for the need of the baby. Like a heartreate issue or something. But saying my baby is too big is bull. Conner was over 11 lbs. There is no, the baby is too big for my hips.
Though i have to say, watching a woman give birth with an epidural * and listnening to Conner mimic it lol* is interesting. Having the natural childbirths, unmedicated, i screamed and shouted through my deliveries. I know how to scream so its effective and not a waste of energy. But its odd watching a woman give birth outsit making any kinds of sounds….
I dont know. im actually considering an epidural this time. Someone told me that im trying to make a marter out of myself by refusing an epidural or pain meds. I ” dont need to be a hero” I allready ” prooved” i could do it. Why not make it easier. But evertything i read dosent say it makes it easier, Ive read so much on the complications. Not to mention my own failed epidural that i did have up in and it caused some really crappy side effects. Terrible back pain even now 5 years later, and headaches.
Sigh. Im rambling and not making much sense am i….
I want things to go simple and easy, as they have in the past. If i knew i was going to be met with complications and stupid pushy people at the hospital… i would rather give birth in my bathtub. My neighbor is an EMT, ill just send Tony over when im too far to consider moving lol. Go get the neighbor. Or do it myself.
Even though thats not what i want.
Its kinda funny how, no matter how many kids you have, or how many times you have been in labor, you still are afraid of things…..
I would rather tear then be cut, i would rather have a quick childbirth over a c section. I would rather go into labor naturally over an induction although i dont want to go past 40 weeks again. Being pregnant for 42 weeks, twice is more then i want to deal with. I dont want another 11 lb baby, which is why im on a very strict diet and manage my calorie and carb intake.
i know that wants dont add up when it comes to what is best for hte baby. I just hope that when the time comes, i know what is best and not what im pressured into doing. :/
